A BigFella Needs A Big Picture

by Brian Pittman

I hope everyone has had a great week so far.  I want to take a few minutes this morning to pass on a few things that I think may be relevant to us all.  I hope some of you can find a nugget or two in what I have to say useful and worthy of consideration.  For the rest, well, sometimes even us BigFellas are allowed to think a bit too much.

My grandfather passed away on December 19th of 2012.  One of the remarkable things I took from his funeral service was how full and complete his life seemed to have been; how somehow in the course of 86 years he had managed to tie up the loose ends of his existence and while he left a family behind it was not in a state of disarray or chaos.  Sadly, however, I am left this morning with a stark contrast to that with the news of the passing of one of my father's closest friends.  While this man didn't leave a house in disarray or a damaged family by any means, I find myself saddened by the things he left undone. This man left this world in the midst of unfulfilled plans for his family and community and while I'm sure his family will see what I'm sure will come to be his legacy to fruition, I find it a reason for pause.

BigFellas, we all lead hectic and crazy lives.  We tend to get caught up in our deadlines with work or worries over our kids or whatever generic tedium interrupts our daily focus.  Hey, it happens to the best of us.  If you'll indulge me just a moment I'd like to share something I learned over the past year of unemployment. When any one area of your life becomes dominant and all consuming, the rest of it is going to get neglected - period.  I was all about my job, no questions asked. Then one day it was gone. A couple of depressed weeks (okay months)  later I woke up and realized that I had an entire life to live as well.  It turns out that the old acorn about everything needing to have its place is really more like an oak tree in the long run.

So with all that being said, I encourage each of you today to take a moment and look at your own big picture.  Look at that overall life and see what's really going on with your time on this rock.  Are you paying attention to what is really the most important?  If you passed suddenly today, what would your legacy be?  I was doing a little reading the other day as research for a book and found out that one of the Norse traditions when it came to funerals is that very little was put on a headstone other than a name and maybe how old you were.  They believed that it wasn't necessary because a persons' deeds and reputation should outlive them.  If you weren't a remarkable person, why bother carving it in stone? That struck me as poignant before today's events and now even moreso.

The Big Picture.  What your life is really about.  The big ol' brass tacks.  

RIP Mr. Norman Simpson.

Email: Did You Hear That? A Visual Guide

by Brian Pittman

We have our first official email question sent in to The BigFella's Guide.

Gary writes:  "... I would really like someone to explain to me what's with all the screaming and yelling going on in the gym. It kind of freaks me out."

Gary, this is one of those really complicated simple answers.  Simply, all the noise you're hearing is most likely someone grunting, yelling, or the like with exertion.  Hey like it or not with enough weight on the bar EVERYBODY is gonna make some noise from time to time.  (It's probably worth noting that some of that grunting and yelling needs to have the words "in pain" tacked on to the end but let's just try not to focus on that, shall we?)

Where it gets complicated is when you start to wonder if all the noise you hear is necessary or even warranted.  What I mean is that there are some times that someone is in the gym and making noise just to draw attention to themselves.  We have a name for those folks:

In some cases, the noise you are hearing is simply intensity and emotion.  Hey, sometimes the large folk just excited when they finally pick up the equivalent of half of their F150 without soiling themselves.  That might look something like this:

Unless you're part of the group they're lifting with, just ignore it and go on.  Or join Planet Fitness. You know, the Lunk Alarm folks.

Lastly you may occasionally hear the random bodily function go off, loudly.  Just try to ignore as best possible or just break down and laugh with the rest of us.  It's okay, we all do it sooner or later.

Hope that answers your question Gary!

Kind Words of Caution

by Brian Pittman

Brothers and Sisters, I come to you today with simple, humble words of caution brought on by a friend's comments on Facebook.  One of our gym friends made a comment a few days ago that has stuck in my widdle iddy biddy noggin for a few days now.  After contemplating his words, it occurs to me that they may be worth passing on to those of you who read the blog regularly.

Simply put, our friend wondered what the gym was going to be like over the next few weeks as all the New Years Knuckleheads come pouring through the front door, resolutions in hand, and do their best to permanently injure themselves.  

Now where our friend has the ability to be kindly generic on his comments, I on the other hand (to paraphrase Eric Roberts in the Expendables) am not burdened with that moral dilemma.  

Let's start with the more obvious:

Attention 30ish year old guy who was a star athlete 10+ years and 50+ lbs ago.  Welcome back to the house of iron and pain brother.  Take it from me, the guy who learned the same lesson a year ago:  those round black discs on the racks are made of iron and they have gotten a lot fucking heavier since you last met.     Please keep this in mind as you attempt to show off to your buddy that you dragged in from work with you.  Just because you could toss 405 up on a bench press like it was made of marshmallow fluff in college doesn't mean that whatever deity you now pray to after too much beer will save your ass from having it fall on your chest like a boulder.  A large, unforgiving, yet highly humorous to many of those around you boulder.  Particularly when you've spent 15 minutes beforehand telling everyone around what a bad-ass you used to be.  Please don't be that guy.

Attention attractive, 30ish mom who is upset with the fact that she's suddenly competing with her husband's 22 year old secretary for "quality time."  True you were a knockout in college.  True you've had three kids along the way and the unruly bastards did to your body what all unruly bastards do to their condos: they tore it up like the last suite Brett Michaels used to audition groupies in 1989.  We get it.  You don't like the way you look anymore and you're going to do something about it.  Awesome, just keep one thing in mind:  running on a treadmill until you fall the hell out when you haven't run across the yard in 10 years is not going to help anything.  Get a trainer, your husband can afford it.  Also, just a note, no matter what you do your husband will still be a two timing asshole.  Refocus your quest to regain hotness as a means to land his replacement.  (Also, just one other side note: you are probably still a hell of a lot hotter than you think you are... just sayin'...)

Dear Mr. I watched a couple of YouTube videos and now I'm an expert:  LISTEN CLOSELY.  Please kindly and directly shut the hell up before you get someone other than yourself hurt.  Also, those people you're trying to tell what they're doing wrong constantly don't want your input.  If they did they'd ask, believe me.  A good gym is kind of a unique place.  When you've earned the respect of those around you, it suddenly becomes okay to ask questions and have them asked of you.  Being a chock-full-of-bullshit, know-it-all assclown earns you nothing my friend.

Lastly, and this one is just a pet peeve of mine, please do not bag on anyone else and what they can and cannot do.  I've touched on this before but I really mean this with all of my heart.  The gym is not a place to show off or brag and it is an individual journey at its heart.  If you choose to bag on the guy who is proud of himself for finally being able to deadlift 225 after six months of hard work, please remember this: we all saw you drop 315 on the floor last night and whine like an angry baby.  Please don't be that jerk or the guys who laugh at the thought of using your workout weight as a first set warm up, you know those boys with 675 on the bar and hate in their eyes, will call you on it.  There is always a bigger beast out there my friend.  Always.

There is one more set of people heading into the gym this glorious New Years that I also want to touch on: those that are there for a reason.  You've decided to make a change in your life for whatever reason. You're tired of being fat.  You're tired of having no energy.  You want your old body back.  You want a new body period.  Hell, I don't care if you saw the Avengers movie and think you can be the next Hulk.  For whatever reason you're serious about being here and I have only one thing to say to you:  WELCOME AND GOOD LUCK!

With Regards to the Two R's

by Brian Pittman

Happy 2013 to everyone.  I hope you all had one amazingly memorable New Year's celebration, or are possibly reading this while the party keeps-a-rockin', but nonetheless be safe so you're still around to be part of the BigFellas experience as it kicks into high gear this year!

Before we get started with today's topic, there's a quick bit of housekeeping we need to attend to first:

As a site, The BigFella's Guide is gearing up to dig deep into what it means to be a large and in charge dude over the next twelve months.  Are you a BigFella? Do you have experiences you'd like to share or thoughts on what it truly means to be one of us?  Gentlemen (and the amazing ladies in our lives), you now have a place to call home and voice whatever it is that is on your mind.  Beginning today, January 1, 2013, The BigFella's Guide is starting an open contribution policy.  ALL topics are welcome and encouraged.  For example, we're in progress right now of proofing posts on gym questions, beards/facial hair, resources for clothing and style, and yes we're even readying another article on sex and the big guy as well.  Send your emails to bigfellasguide@gmail.com and we'll get them published for you as soon as space is available.  Please be sure to include your name (or indicate that you want to remain anonymous) so we can make sure that credit is given where it belongs.  (A tiny legal note: all contributions become the property of The BigFella's Guide and its management team unless clearly indicated otherwise in your email. Similarly we reserve the right / pretty much guarantee that entries will be proofed and edited unless requested otherwise.  Should any entry need heavy modification for any reason, you will be contacted via email prior to publication for your consent.)

Moving on to the good stuff then...

Let's take a minute today to talk about the two R's: rest and recovery.  Now before you immediately tune me out and assume that I'm only talking to my fellow gym monkeys out there, hold your horses and pay attention for just a few minutes.  This won't take that long, I promise.

I'm sure most of you are aware that there is a direct correlation between your size and how hard your heart has to work to circulate blood.  Whether you're large due to obesity, musculature, or you're just goddamn overgrown like I am, our bodies are supplied with roughly the same size bio-mechanical pumping system as everyone else.  Hopefully you're also clear on the fact that this little miracle muscle (I mean your heart genius)  is only going to pump but so many times.  Obviously taking care of yourself helps to lower the speed at which your heart has to thump to get the job done, but there's one little thing so many of us can do to help ourselves out that we don't do nearly often enough: get our nightly eight hours of sleep.  Studies have shown, particularly in Sweden and Norway where they tend to grow slightly larger younguns, that taller men in excellent physical condition that do not get at least six hours of sleep nightly can face the same levels of cardiovascular disease as a man of normal height who is grossly obese.  Rest: you have to get it, pure and simple. My favorite argument against getting enough sleep is that there just isn't enough time in the day to get everything done.  My favorite response came from my doctor almost ten years ago when I tried to toy with a cardiac event: if you're dead and gone, how much of that crap will matter anyway?

Now let us shift our focus a bit and get to those gym addicts.  Rest and Recovery. We all know the terms.  Some of us even hear them just about every workout when our training partner pretends to be allergic to oxygen breaks when lifting heavy.  What I'm referring to more though in this segment is on incorporating rest and recovery into your training regimen.  For example, how many days a week do you lift?  3, 4, 5, 6, or 7? How many days do you allow between heavy lifts that target similar body parts? 0,1,2, or more? When is the last time you just took a week flat off from the gym when you weren't training for a show, contest, or the like?  The truth is a very simple one that you can find all over the interwebs with very little effort:  not allowing yourself adequate time to rest and recover can lead to overtraining.  Overtraining is one of the most frequent causes of injury, just behind stupidity and bad technique, but is also one of the leading causes for those frustrating bastards we all deal with called plateaus.  How do you plan for rest and recovery in your workouts?  Let me introduce you to the best resources in your gym: all the other big guys around you.  Find the guys who know what they're doing and have been at it a while and ask them how they do it.  Chances are if you're serious about what you're doing there in the first place they'll be happy to help you along.  My two cents of suggestion are simple: slow down your workout, plan for a light or off week at the end of each training cycle, get your sleep at night, and just be smart about how you plan your workouts.  How did I learn this stuff?  Hey bud, I'm not a personal trainer.  I learned it the same way most of those other big guys did: stupidity, exhaustion, overtraining, and finally manning up and asking a damn question!

Have a good one BigFellas!